today was a good day. a very productive one. and i have a confession to make.
i hired a mommy's helper.
bella has hit her stride as a tiny tasmanian devil, whirling around the house, causing a path of destruction in her wake. bless her.
last week, i made the executive decision that, if i wanted to get anything done, i needed some help.
my girl couldn't have come too soon. we walked in the house from the store and duke had spread garbage through the kitchen, living and dining room and pooped and peed in the hallway. it took me 45 minutes to get it all cleaned up. but in the rest of the time she was here i did laundry, cleaned the table off, unpacked a couple of boxes, took 4 loads of stuff down to the dumpster and car and even answered a couple of e-mails. all while bella played excitedly with her new bff.
and i felt no guilt.
if it had been a normal day, i would have gotten maybe half of that done, but would have fought my urge to play with her, and my need to get stuff accomplished. we would play for a bit, then i would tell her to play on her own for a bit, and she would for about 2.5 seconds until she hunted me down, strewing all her worldly goods along behind her thus destroying whatever i just cleaned and in the mean time making me feel both angry and guilty.
before i hired her, i thought a lot about it. it isn't much-3 days a week, 2 hours a day. but just that short bit of productive time made the time i spent with bella so much more involved. i didn't feel like i had to split my time, because i knew i would have time to do what needed to be done.
this week, we started getting back into our routine, and having a schedule always makes me feel more productive and like my time really matters, rather than wasting days with no purpose. i am held accountable for my days, and when i go to sleep at night, i rarely have that "i forgot something!" feeling.
we are re-incorporating a lot of the things we did before we pcs'ed: "preschool" (at home), music class, art classes, and playdates, and starting some new things-MOPS begins this wednesday, and it's the first time i have been a part of this group. and of course, my mommy's helper, 3 days a week! =)
since i decided not to put bella in preschool, and keep her home instead, i feel like all of these different interactions will allow for her to get a well rounded experience that i have control over.
next year, we will look into the german preschool near our house, but currently, with cora coming in a few short weeks, i think it would only add to the chaos, and i like being the one to teach her and experience her learning.
so i get more time to see her "feeding duke and reading him dis book about JEEsus. 'once upon a time, there was a castle and in the castle was a baby named JEEsus.' you like dat story, mommy?"
yes, baby. i like dat story.