Wednesday, May 25, 2011

6 years.

this post is actually a little late. our anniversary was 5 days ago, but i was on my way to visit with joel for a few days . i spent the entire day driving, but it was most definitely worth it to spend one last weekend together. 

this is a weird way to start out our 7th year of marriage, apart and with little communication for half of it. but we will make it through. and we will be stronger for it. we always are. 

the first time i met you, i was moving into my dorm my sophomore year of college. i didn't know a soul except for my room mate, and as soon as i got my stuff down and my mom out the door, we were called to a floor meeting. our floor and the boys floor above us. you were the first to speak. you were confident, though not arrogant. you spoke with authority. and you were enthusiastic about the coming year. 

you planned fun events and made sure everyone was having as much fun as they wanted. you were silly and goofy and made people laugh. 

those were the first things i saw in you. and the first things i loved in you. 

that was 8 years ago, and i remember it like it was yesterday. since then, you have been my best friend. i can't imagine my life any other way than with you in it.

i have more fun,  i'm more challenged, i do more, i see more, i am more. 

seeing you as a dad has brought about a new love and respect that i could have never imagined. you are gentle and sweet and playful. bella adores you, which makes my heart sing. and you adore her which makes me melt. 

we've had our ups and downs, but through each moment we have been there, holding the other one and reminding them what's important. i can always count on you to say what i need to hear, even when it's not what i want to hear. 

on friday, we celebrated 6 years in a somewhat unorthodox way. most people go to fancy hotels and have nice big dinners with sparkly gifts exchanged. we celebrated by visiting you at your government approved hotel, in a military town far away. we took bella to the playground and then went to the mall and we ate dinner in the food court. we spent the weekend recording you reading new books you bought for the baby, swimming in the hotel pool and playing with the trains at barnes and noble. it was a bitter sweet weekend. each moment, i was reminded how much i would miss you and how much you and i had become one. just as we would be laughing about something only we would find funny, a though would pass through my mind and i would remember that at the end of the weekend, we would say goodbye, and i would start to cry. i've never felt so bi-polar in all my life. 

but it was also such an amazing way to spend those last few days-i think we both really cherished each moment we had.

 happy 6 years, babe. thank you for who you are. i love your energy and how you balance me out. you are smart, and funny, and charming, and creative. you make me laugh and you hold me when i cry. you are my other half. i'm going to miss you like crazy, but i am also so proud of you and i think you are pretty amazingly brave. 

i love you. more than words can say. 

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