Thursday, June 3, 2010

one thing i never want back.

i have never been good with writing prompts. they usually inspire writers block, for me. but i was perusing the blogoshpere this morning and i saw this, and IMMEDIATELY i was inspired. because i have been wanting to write about this for a while, but just haven't so here it is:

“What did you once lose? Write about your search to find it again.”

my first thought was my mind, but i lose that on a daily basis and rarely ever find it again. but there is one thing that about a year and a half ago i lost, and now, have found again. my weight. i know, i know, "get over it already! you just had a baby" (um hello, 5 1/2 MONTHS AGO!).

i have never been a skinny minny, but i have never been what you would call fat, either. i've played sports my whole life, have always been active, and have never had a problem eating my veggies. i have, however always had a little extra cushion. i always tried to lose it, but mostly it was my bff and couldn't stand to go far.

so when we started trying to have a baby, my doctors kept telling me (as they did for EVERY health problem i struggled with) to lose some weight. so, joel and i teamed up and decided to lose some weight together. we did p90x and i successfully lost 10 pounds in a month!! now at that point, i only needed to lose about 10 more pounds to be well in the green. and then i got pregnant.

i couldn't do p90x anymore, but i did continue to walk, run, swim, hike and eat well (when i wasn't puking at the mere mention of anything made from an animal). as you know, the weight slowly packs on, but i was able to keep my weight pretty low, only gaining 25 pounds over the whole 9 months. after giving birth to an almost 9 pound baby, i had lost close to 15 pounds after the birth, and over the next few weeks dropped almost every single bit of it, again LOSING my weight. this is the one thing i don't mind losing! i'll lose it every day and never be sad.

but alas, the prompt asks for something you found. well i found my weight. yep, hiding in that stress-eating bowl of ice cream. i am a really good finder of this weight. i never lose it for long. it's much like the cat that came back. i shipped it to timbuktu, and it showed up the next morning.

maybe it's time i embrace it??? nah, i think i'll keep trying to lose this one thing. maybe one day, i won't be able to find it again.

4 comments:

Leah said...

You know, I was doing the P90X too...lost 5 lbs then got pregnant! Maybe there's something in the program that makes getting pregnant easier :) haha I gained ::gasp:: 50 lbs during my pregnancy, so I've got you beat there girl. Although I had some severe swelling, so it was mostly water weight. I've lost all but 5lbs of it and its the most pesky 5 lbs every! It feels like I can't do anything to get rid of it. On top of that..I can't find the time nor energy to TRY and lose it thru exersise. The weekends are about the only time I can go for walks...you have plenty of time to work on it dear!

MaryAnne said...

I recently joined Weight Watchers to lose what I found. They enourage new eating lifestyle & "just do it" activity of any kind. Today I came home from my meeting energized! I put my P90X into the DVD player, ready to work out after I ate some fruit. While eating watermelon, I was checking my FB & came across your timely blog. Justine & Leah, now I am nervous about working out to my P90X & getting pregnant! ESPECIALLY since I've gone through menopause! So just to be on the safe side, I'll work out to The Biggest Loser 30 Day Jump Start DVD instead. True story.

BTW,it just goes to show, read the fine print warning labels on excercise DVD's!

Justine said...

hahahahaha. maryanne......you are too funny

i tell you, even in the fertility clinic, they were telling me that even 5 pounds of extra weight can make it harder to conceive. but also, we were exercising together. so we were like....on the same page. ;) i think that helps too. you know, endorphins and all.

Will said...

Just keep it up and stay focused :) If you're looking for help or motivation stop by.

www.FitnessAchievement.com